Sure It Tastes Good, But Can I Smoke It?

   On Monday, my sister Adriane let me know that she had just gotten to smoke a Cuban cigar. One of her friends had recently been to Aruba and on her return decided to take up casual smuggling. Adriane reaped the illegal benefits. Now, I'm known to enjoy the occasional cigar with friends and have sampled, if not a wide variety, then at least a respectable one. Still though, I'm not certain that my pallette is sufficiently deep in order to enjoy the highly prized and sought after Cuban. I wouldn't pass one up though should one with my name on it ride a raft to Miami or sneak a trip stuffed in the bottom of some white girl's carry-on. I'm just not sure I'd be able to tell the difference between a Cuban and a Puerta Rican. Regardless, what my sister's revelation did to me was cause my brain to catch a thought train to Whatthefuck Station.     Tobacco is an interesting plant with a long and rich history. Not just rich in a metaphorical sense, but also literal since at one point the leaves were actually used as money. My question however is, "How did it get to that point?" What exactly caused that first Native American to decide that tobacco had medicinal properties? And what about drying it? Who thought, "Hey these leaves are pretty bitter right now, but maybe if I hang them upside down for the next several weeks/months inside of this hut they'll be better." History is full of this kind of event; jumps in knowledge without any easily explainable reason.     Take the potatoe and legumes for example. Most fruits and vegetables are good when eaten raw; carrots, berries, apples, celery, etc. The potatoe and legumes, like peas, beans and peanuts, are only actually tasty AFTER being cooked. For that matter, what about meat? At some time in prehistory our ancestors went from bloody meat and raw fruit and veggie omnivores to putting their meals in the fire. What would have possessed them to make that leap? Some other culinary advances: grains ("This grass isn't very good to eat but I bet if we take enough of these tiny, little seeds, and smash them into a fine powder we could mix them with other stuff."), beer and whiskey ("OR we could boil these seeds for a while, add some other shit we don't know what to do with, let it sit for awhile then drink it."), cheese ("Damn it! The milk's gone bad again. Maybe if I add some vinegar and squeeze it all for awhile....") and coffee ("Fuck! This legume is even nasty when it's cooked. I know, I'll roast them, grind 'em up and pour boiling water through the grounds. Still doesn't taste good? Well, can we at least still drink the water?")    This kind of stuff doesn't just affect the FDA though. Animal skin/hair clothing makes perfect sense, but silk is another thing altogether. "Stringy secretions from a worm's butt? Yes please I WOULD like a shirt made of that. And matching pants."    The big one though, the species changer, was metal. At one time, we were creatures of wood, stone,  leather and bone. However, at some point 7000 years ago in what is widely believed to be seperate sites in Asia and Europe, some smart people discovered metals. Have you ever seen copper ore? It's a rock. Some are prettier than others, but it's still just a rock. The same kind of rock humans had been using for thousands of years to make into crude tools and forms. The same rocks strewn all over the place and suddenly these dudes realize that, "hey, if I put this very specific type of rock into a really hot fire it'll melt and I can do stuff with it." What?! Why decide to do that in the first place? It'd be a bit like you or I saying, "Let's bombard this piece of polypropylene with carbon radioisotopes, but leave those pieces of polycarbonate, polystyrene and polyethylene where they are." We know the plastic will become radioactive, but that's it. Why suspect that if we juice it enough it'll become anything other than a hot rock?    I don't really have a point to all of this. If you've been reading to find one, well, sorry 'bout cha. I just marvel at some of the events in our collective history that seem so simple and rudimentary to us now, but that required something else. Call it God's grace, alien interference or just sheer dumb luck, but whatever caused these leaps I find them incredible and enjoy just thinking about them. Look out! O_O More likely than not my next entry will be about the birth of my daughter Avery.